Fourth Weekend - 12-14 Apr 2019

This weekend we met in the Walmart parking lot to trade cars and kids. Tiffany acted very different than all of our previous encounters since she left. Almost like there was hope of reconciliation. She even asked for a hug before we left.

I was able to pick them up at 2pm because, for some reason, Nate didn't go to school on Friday. I asked him why he didn't have school and he said that it was because John didn't go to school. I wasn't to surprised by this because Tiffany frequently finds reasons not to send him to school or to pick him up early from school. Then we went back to the house to plan out the evening.

The first thing we did was vote on what to do later. The options were to go to a free event called Pioneer Painter and Heritage Exhibit where the kids could look at Asian American art, go to a concert in the park, and go to Barnes & Noble for their story time. No one wanted to go to the concert in the park. Nathan wanted to do the story time but Lily and Matthew wanted to go to the museum. Nate conceded to go to the museum and I said we could do our own story time later.

Next, we played Barrel of Monkeys. We each tried the correct way of doing it. Matthew got frustrated fast because he decided it was too hard when I told him he couldn't use two hands. Lily did get one on with an assist of her other hand. Nathan got two or three. I got eight. I let Matthew us two hands and he got to eight the first time and ten the second. Lily got all ten. Nate may have gotten to four before using both hands and easily got to ten. Then we went up to Lily's room and cleaned it all together. Then we did scriptures and stories because I knew we wouldn't have time later.

While we were cleaning Lily's room, I texted Nathan's best friend, Daniel's parents, Ryan and Stacey, to invite them to join us at the Asian American Resource Center. Ryan texted back saying that they were going to go to a free outdoor screening of Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse and invited us to join them. I decided that the locations were close enough and the times were far enough apart that we could do both. Then I told the kids that they would have a surprise after the art museum.

For dinner we had two variations of chicken noodle soup with olives on the side. Then we headed to the Asian American Resource Center. There we looked at art and helped them to pay attention to details. Nate sent a couple pictures to Chantal of his favorite two art pieces. Then after seeing everything on display Lily saw the food and asked someone if we could have some. They said yes and after looking at everything they decided that they would only try the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I was hoping they would branch out because there was a lot of sushi but they wouldn't. Lily and Nathan tried one bite of a rice filled role but that was too much for them.

Then we went to the outdoor movie. The kids played together with Daniel and Jeremiah until dark when they started the movie. They all loved running and jumping and Lily swung in a hammock. Matthew and Lily danced to the music on the platform under the screen. It rained a little before the movie and during the movie Matthew and Lily took turns sitting on my lap. Matthew got a little scared during the action scenes but wouldn't close his eyes or look away. It ended around 10:30 which was rough on all the kids. They all fell asleep on the drive home.

On Saturday morning, they all woke up earlier than I expected. Matthew ate breakfast right away. We went over to President Loderup's house around 8:30 and left around 9:15 or 9:30. Once we were home again everyone else ate breakfast. I had Nathan read scriptures while Matthew and Lily played. Then we went to Barnes & Noble for their late morning story time and stayed there coloring and reading for a while. I knew Matthew would get hungry while we were there because of his early breakfast so I made him a sandwich and as soon as story time was over and while the other two were coloring I let him eat. Nathan wanted to buy a book which I told him he didn't have money for. He expected me to buy it but I told him if he wanted it, he would have to buy it and that we would look at his spending money later. Barnes & Noble also gave out coupons to have $4 grilled cheese sandwiches. Nate and Lily also wanted to do that but I told them we didn't have the money for that and we would go home and I would make them grilled cheese sandwiches there.

On the way home he decided that if he didn't have enough money to buy the book he wanted he would spend his money at Game Stop. I can tell that he still has a lot to learn about money and he's not getting a good understanding of it from Tiffany. I briefly tried to teach him that the purpose of money is not to just spend it because you have it but I think that will take a while of repeated lessons before he understands that. When we got home I took out his spending money which turned out to only be a dollar and he got very upset and claimed that his money had been stolen because he should have had at least five dollars. I don't think that was the case this time. Tiffany has been known to dip into their money bags before, but this time I think it was just Nate's incorrect expectation of what he had saved up.

For grilled cheese sandwiches I had them help with the bread, cheese, and butter. Nathan wanted to go to Ginette and Curtis' house in the evening so after texting to see if that was an option, I had them do scriptures while I prepared lunch. Once that was done, it was time for haircuts and baths. I cut Matthew's hair first and gave him a bath. His patience was short for both the haircut and the bath. Then I cut Nathan's hair then Lily's hair. I chose to do layers again with Lily which took a whole hour but it turned out well. Nathan spent the whole hour playing in the tub and not cleaning himself which almost prevented us from going down south because he put up a fuss when I told him he had five minutes to be clean and get out when the water had gone cold on him. Lily's bath was fast and we made it out of the house by 4:35 over a half hour later than I wanted.

At Ginette's place I let them spend time with Atala, Ginette, and Curtis while I made omelets for everyone. We took off around 7:30 or 8. Everyone went straight to bed but it was earlier than the night before.

On Friday and Saturday nights I chose not to have the kids help with cleaning up Swisher's poop or puke, but Sunday morning when he puked again, because of eating a whole tub of butter that I accidentally left out when we went to Ginette's, I decided to teach them how to clean it up. Nate was putting up a fuss about the smell before breakfast and I asked him if he wanted to clean it up; he said no. I told them that if they are not willing to clean it up they have to accept the smell and that we would eat in the kitchen despite the smell.

After breakfast was completed by everyone, I asked each one if they wanted to clean up the throw up. I then said that since no one would volunteer to do it, we would all have to learn how to do it and take turns. We gathered the paper towels, dog odor remover spray, baking soda, and the trash can. I went first and last at using the paper towels. Nathan put up such a fuss that I gave him a time out after making him do his part. Lily had the easiest time. Matthew didn't put up a fuss but did gag a couple times. Both Lily and Matthew did a much better job than Nathan. After Nate's timeout, we each took turns spraying and wiping the spot on the couch and floor. And each took turns putting baking soda on the spot on the couch. Again, everyone did a better job than Nathan at the baking soda.

Once everyone had washed up, we did scripture story time and I read only about four stories and had them act out a couple scenes. I went a little in depth into the story of Peter testifying of Christ using the plan of salvation visual aid where I taught them about the rock and keys. We ended scripture story time with the wise man and foolish man song. Then I helped them get ready for church. Once they were ready I let them play while I shaved. After I finished shaving I got them lunch, cheese sandwich and cheese tortillas, and showered while they ate.

They were pretty well behaved at church. After church we stayed so I could sing in choir. They were not as well behaved for that. At home we did scriptures then stories before I make omelets again for dinner. Matthew fell asleep on me while I was reading stories and I had to wake him up when it was time to leave. While I was making dinner I had Nate read to me. Nate did a whole chapter for his scriptures after church. After dinner I loaded up the van with what they had prepared and read more stories. Nate did more of his chapter until it was time to go and switch the kids again.

Tiffany told me she is going to go see a lawyer this week and I tried to persuade her that we could still work this out. She again used her mental health as an excuse, assuming that us staying together could only negatively affect her mental health. I suggested again that we could stay separated while we work it out and she said no. This makes me so sad.